I have recently discovered how much this society takes doors for granted. I am currently getting my house remodeled and we have all the doors taken off in our house to have them painted. I never really realized how much doors mean to our way of life. Without doors, it is really weird to shower and go to the bathroom with other people in the house. It is also really hard to anything in your room at night when everyone else is asleep, because anything you do is heard all around the house, and I can't wake the others up or my mom will make me sleep in the garage without food for a week. On the other hand, if you are trying to get some sleep, it is really hard to get some shut eye with the loudest snoring I've ever heard in my life coming from across the hall.
I just want all you guys to go up to your parents right now and give them a big hug and say thank you for not taking all the doors off in my house. Peace humans, stop taking this shit for granted
Monday, January 12, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Global Warming
I just saw proof that global warming is upon us!
Here's what happened:
I was sitting outside, enjoying a few drags off of a premium Camel, staring at the beautiful sky. The clouds were scattered around, breaking up the big sheet of blue. Although the sun was shining, I still needed a jacket to stay at a comfortable warmth. As I sat there, I started thinking about certain things, like how just yesterday I was spending time with my dad, and now he's thousands of miles away. I stared at the sky and just wanted to be in an airplane, flying to a new place where I could explore and not have to worry about anything, like school or getting a job.
As I sat there, just reminiscing and day dreaming, I saw something that I have never seen in my life.... A fucking ice cream truck, in January. If that's not proof of global warming, I really don't know what is. I also saw something else sitting out there that really got me thinking.
As far back as I can remember, I've always had the same dream car, a Cadillac CTS V series. As I was sitting still thinking about the Ice cream truck, I saw my car drive by. I've always seen it parked down the street, and I've often wondered who was the lucky person driving. When I finally saw the person behind the wheel, it really surprised me. It was a white man, probably 25, with a backwards hat smoking a cigarette. As long as I've been alive, I've had a hero, and today it officially changed to that guy. I want to be exactly like him when I grow up, and I know its possible because he is me, and I am him. We grew up on the same block, in fact he only lives a few houses down. We are both white, we both smoke, and I could see it in his eyes that he is also a blogger.
So I leave you with this... If that white trash guy can drive that car, so can I, and if I can, then so can you. You can do whatever you want with your life. I know most of you reading this are my friends in college, and I know for a fact that none of you envision yourself as someone working a regular job, and just going to college full time. School is all bull shit. You are learning crap from someone that had all their knowledge spoon fed to them, and worst of all you are paying for it. Of course, we need an "education" to get the jobs with the big bucks. That's not what we want either, so I don't know why we are all wasting our time. If it weren't for my mom dreaming of having at least one kid graduating college, I would be outta there and just be living my life like I want to. I know I still have a lot of time to do what I want, so I'm not worried too much. Peace humans, get out there and live your life. Stop studying
Here's what happened:
I was sitting outside, enjoying a few drags off of a premium Camel, staring at the beautiful sky. The clouds were scattered around, breaking up the big sheet of blue. Although the sun was shining, I still needed a jacket to stay at a comfortable warmth. As I sat there, I started thinking about certain things, like how just yesterday I was spending time with my dad, and now he's thousands of miles away. I stared at the sky and just wanted to be in an airplane, flying to a new place where I could explore and not have to worry about anything, like school or getting a job.
As I sat there, just reminiscing and day dreaming, I saw something that I have never seen in my life.... A fucking ice cream truck, in January. If that's not proof of global warming, I really don't know what is. I also saw something else sitting out there that really got me thinking.
As far back as I can remember, I've always had the same dream car, a Cadillac CTS V series. As I was sitting still thinking about the Ice cream truck, I saw my car drive by. I've always seen it parked down the street, and I've often wondered who was the lucky person driving. When I finally saw the person behind the wheel, it really surprised me. It was a white man, probably 25, with a backwards hat smoking a cigarette. As long as I've been alive, I've had a hero, and today it officially changed to that guy. I want to be exactly like him when I grow up, and I know its possible because he is me, and I am him. We grew up on the same block, in fact he only lives a few houses down. We are both white, we both smoke, and I could see it in his eyes that he is also a blogger.
So I leave you with this... If that white trash guy can drive that car, so can I, and if I can, then so can you. You can do whatever you want with your life. I know most of you reading this are my friends in college, and I know for a fact that none of you envision yourself as someone working a regular job, and just going to college full time. School is all bull shit. You are learning crap from someone that had all their knowledge spoon fed to them, and worst of all you are paying for it. Of course, we need an "education" to get the jobs with the big bucks. That's not what we want either, so I don't know why we are all wasting our time. If it weren't for my mom dreaming of having at least one kid graduating college, I would be outta there and just be living my life like I want to. I know I still have a lot of time to do what I want, so I'm not worried too much. Peace humans, get out there and live your life. Stop studying
Monday, January 5, 2009
Just to get this thing kick started, I want to let you all know that I'm really fucking hungry right now.
That being said, let's do some blogging!
I want to give you guys a quickie today, because I want to go eat and go spend my Target giftcards.
I just want to know why is that the easiest ways to get rich are all illegal. Are they illegal because it would make it easy for you to get rich, or will they get you rich because it is illegal?
If I really wanted to go start my enterprise right now, I would have to start with the pirating of 18 wheelers and cruise ships. This would be a good way to get some cool stuff and save you money on buying people christmas presents. Whatever you have left over, you could sell on Ebay, or at a garage sale or something. Then, with the money I got from that, I would rent a house in a not so great part of town, because the rent would be cheap. I would use all my cash to start a casino in my house!
I would buy some poker tables, some slot machines, and maybe a roulette wheel. The only thing is, you would have to accept food stamps as bets, and be able to turn those in for cash value later. I would also have to have a backyard where my customers could go roll dice, because they're all into that shit.
I would also get a specialized vending machine, full of ice cold 40 oz's, and cartons of Newports.
I think this would be a great way to get some cash, but you would have to move out of that neighborhood after a while, because eventually something is going to go wrong:
1)You're going to go out of business because they don't have much money to begin with, and they can't gamble anymore once you take it all
2) You're going to get arrested
3) You're going to get robbed
4) You're going to get shot
5) All of the above
If it weren't for those 5 things though, I think this would be a very lucrative business and I would recommend it to everyone. Peace humans!
That being said, let's do some blogging!
I want to give you guys a quickie today, because I want to go eat and go spend my Target giftcards.
I just want to know why is that the easiest ways to get rich are all illegal. Are they illegal because it would make it easy for you to get rich, or will they get you rich because it is illegal?
If I really wanted to go start my enterprise right now, I would have to start with the pirating of 18 wheelers and cruise ships. This would be a good way to get some cool stuff and save you money on buying people christmas presents. Whatever you have left over, you could sell on Ebay, or at a garage sale or something. Then, with the money I got from that, I would rent a house in a not so great part of town, because the rent would be cheap. I would use all my cash to start a casino in my house!
I would buy some poker tables, some slot machines, and maybe a roulette wheel. The only thing is, you would have to accept food stamps as bets, and be able to turn those in for cash value later. I would also have to have a backyard where my customers could go roll dice, because they're all into that shit.
I would also get a specialized vending machine, full of ice cold 40 oz's, and cartons of Newports.
I think this would be a great way to get some cash, but you would have to move out of that neighborhood after a while, because eventually something is going to go wrong:
1)You're going to go out of business because they don't have much money to begin with, and they can't gamble anymore once you take it all
2) You're going to get arrested
3) You're going to get robbed
4) You're going to get shot
5) All of the above
If it weren't for those 5 things though, I think this would be a very lucrative business and I would recommend it to everyone. Peace humans!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
My first 2009 BLOG
I've decided to help all you lazy people out there by doing your new years resolutions for you this year. I don't know about you guys, but I never really did new year's resolutions, because I knew there was absolutely no way I would ever follow through with something like that. Even if you already have new years resolutions, I'm going to tell you to erase them and use my list instead, because I'm sure yours are all boring and pointless (lose weight, be nicer to my wife, etc).
So here's my list of my 30 most important things for all of you to follow to get the most out of 2009...
1) Get arrested
27) Go up to someone you think is out of your league and use the first crappy pick-up line that comes to mind
28) Turn on your TV and your Ipod, then mute the TV and pretend the people on TV are singing whatever song you are listening too
29) Light a cigar with a Benjamin
30) Save up all your spare change all year then stay in the most expensive hotel room you can get for one night
I'm pretty sure that if you do all of those, you will live a happier, more fulfilling life. I know some of them may seem a little absurd, but just try them. Please post any comments of your own new years resolutions... and have a great 2009!
So here's my list of my 30 most important things for all of you to follow to get the most out of 2009...
1) Get arrested
2) Drive through a drive-thru in reverse
3) Throw a waterballoon at oncoming traffic
4) Lose at least 100 dollars at a casino
5) If you smoke, stop
6) Feed the birds
7) Wade where there is a no wading sign
8) Doorbell ditch your boss
9) Sit down and talk to a WWII veteran for an hour
10) Drive until your lost then take your time getting home
11) Movie hop all day in a theater
12) Take a midget on a date
13) Buy a lot from the dollar menu and distribute to any bums you see
14) Light something on fire
15) Out-drink your kid, and if you’re a kid, out-drink your parent
16) Laugh until you pee and fart at the same time
17) Scare one of those goats who faints
18) Hit on an old lady
19) Play catch with a hamster
20) Go into a store where you can't afford anything and try to pay with an I.O.U
21) Go to Spain and order a beer in McDonalds
22) Eat something you've never heard of
23) Sweet talk your way out of a traffic ticket
24) Read a book that teaches the exact opposite of what you believe
25) Steal something nice and give it away as a birthday present
26) Get one of those inflatable pools and fill it with Jello
27) Go up to someone you think is out of your league and use the first crappy pick-up line that comes to mind
28) Turn on your TV and your Ipod, then mute the TV and pretend the people on TV are singing whatever song you are listening too
29) Light a cigar with a Benjamin
30) Save up all your spare change all year then stay in the most expensive hotel room you can get for one night
I'm pretty sure that if you do all of those, you will live a happier, more fulfilling life. I know some of them may seem a little absurd, but just try them. Please post any comments of your own new years resolutions... and have a great 2009!
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